The Least Clever Weed Puns Ever to Appear on T-Shirts

Mary wanna high-quality T(HC)-shirt. Get it?

Weed Shirt

In the ’90s, a strange and beautiful phenomenon hit our great nation. No, I’m not talking about boy bands. I’m not talking about the swing revival. I am definitely not talking about POGs. I am talking about beautifully shitty weed puns plastered on T-shirts. At every beachfront tourist trap and shopping mall Spencer’s Gifts in the country, these shirts reigned supreme. If you wanted to let the world know you smoke grass, this is how you did it. Here are some of the least clever weed puns ever to appear on T-shirts.

Bragging about underage drinking to covertly brag about smoking weed: The teenage mind is truly fascinating.


Was Bong-er King taken?


As a teenager, finding ways to shoehorn in jokes about 4/20 was just as exciting as actually partaking.


Puns like this are why people think potheads are lazy.


Tryin’ to get some of that subprime kush.


Everywhere you want to be (high).


“Hit” and “Do” aren’t even close to rhyming.


Not nearly as fast as his cousin.


Someone needs a spanking for this.


Staler than some five-minute-old fries.


The mermaid is double-fisting. Clutch.


Use it with your iBong, bro.


*pushes up glasses* Actually, THC addiction is impossible. You see….


Would you smoke it in a box? Would you smoke it with a fox?


Looks like Mario’s into more than just mushrooms.


Good God. This shirt’s existence is a national tragedy.


Didn’t even have to change anything.


The least athletic baseball jersey ever made.


A regular Taco Bell T-shirt is also a stoner T-shirt, though.


Definitely prefer the original to the reboot.


Vaporize me, Cap’n!


Got to smoke em all!


My highs don’t even play music anymore. :(


Recently rebranded to “AmeriKush.”


We finish with parody of the very foundation of our democracy. Sick.

Written on October 06, 2016 by

Brenden Gallagher

Brenden Gallagher works in television and writing in Los Angeles. He worked on Revenge, Heartbeat, and Famous in Love. His writing has appeared at Complex, VH1, and MERRY JANE. Follow him on Twitter @muddycreekU